Monday, May 18, 2009

My cab ride of death

This past weekend I went to chicago for Dawn's wedding.
It was just so much fun. I really missed everyone, so it was just a blast going back and seeing all my friends. 
However my flight was fairly early the next morning and I had to get there a little early, as requested by the airport. 
So I took a cab to the airport from the hotel I was staying at about 45 minutes away.

This hunk of junk showed up at the hotel to pick me up ( it was 20 minutes late. )
 It looked like it had seen better days. The inside was a shell, I almost felt like the ill fated cab passengers in The Bone Collector. 
I am pretty sure the shocks were shot...and that if he went over 60mph we surely would have exploded. It made a really loud, strange, somewhat alarming rattling sound. In fact I wasnt even sure if we were going to make it at all. I had a vision of the car puttering to a stop in the Middle of the Dan Ryan and me having to hoof it to the airport, dragging my insanely heavy bag.
Everything in that car was duct taped or rubber banded onto something. But by golly he did have a Garmon GPS system.(which did not kep him from making TWO wrong turns.  Yes two. When the garmon says Turn right here, do not pass it then turn right at the next street. Thats not how it works, sir.)
This guy was about 192 years old, and he couldnt pick a lane AT ALL.  I swear we hit every pothole and at one point I am pretty convinced I saw an Orange construction pylon take a fall.
For one stretch of road it was 2 lanes and on either side was a cement wall. There were times that I was POSITIVE we were going into that cement barricade. If not the barricade on one side, then the car in the lane next to us. 
And he would just kind of start drifting into the other lanes. not looking before switching, just kind of easing in, unintentionally.
  I just shut my eyes and prayed like hell.
I thought the trip would never end.
Then this semi truck started coming into our lane. We were in his blind spot or something and my cab driver doesnt lay on the horn or anything. He just slams on the brakes, causing me to fly forward and smack into the back of the seats. (the seatbelt was broken...)  he didnt apologize. He just started back up (that car went 0 to 60 in 5 minutes) and we kept going on out way.
It was awful. I thought to myself, "If I dont die in this cab it will be a good day indeed".

So chicago and my friends in chicago, I miss you. I wish I could have stayed longer and I promise I will come back to visit much more often than I have.  However my next visit ONE OF YOU WILL TAKE ME TO THE AIRPORT!  i am boycotting taxis from now on. 


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