Be there or be square

in 6 months from now I will be THE BIG ONE. You know, FOUR-OH. yikes.

2 years ago as I realized that I was fat and tired and unhappy I decided to take control of my life and my eating and my health. I lost 70 pounds, yet I was still 20 away from my goal weight. Things were going great, I was feeling well, I was looking great. I was able to wear clothes I hadnt fit into in years. Life. Was. Good.

Little by little some of that weight I had lost started to creep back in. Little by little my healthy eating habits fell by the wayside as I stopped by McDonalds on my way home from work. Little by little the excuses for not running started creeping into my brain and my thoughts and my words. Little by little did my portions become a little bigger, a little less healthy, the food I had eschewed working its way back onto my plate.
As I stepped onto the scale this morning I realized that the past 9 months I have undone a chunk of all that hard work.

So I decided to get back in gear. No more excuses.
 I have decided that in order to do that I have to do something big.

So in about 6 1/2 months I will be posting my big reveal. No excuses.
I need to do this to keep accountable. I need this challenge in the back of my mind egging me on to do what I need to do.
I dont want to embarrass or humiliate myself, so I think this will help me work harder.

July 20-  Be there or be square.

My weight Loss so far...a pictorial

Over the past 2 1/2 years I have seriously yo yo dieted. I went up and down. I was at my heaviest (ugh) and now I am at the lightest I have been in 15 years. I still have 20 pounds to go, but I am just so happy and proud of how far I have come.
As I was putting together this photo journey, I realized I don't have a lot of photos of myself.  I HATED having my picture taken. I knew I was fat and I thought if I didn't have the photo evidence, then it wasn't true.
So let us begin:

his was my heaviest: July 2011.  I was out in Spokane Washington visiting my friend.  She is so tall and svelte and gorgeous, and I am dumpy and fat with a huge fat face.  HATE this picture, which is a shame because we had such a great time together. I was a Size 22 pants and a 3x top. Fat and round.

Christmas 2011.  Co worker and I at our holiday party.  I had lost a little weight., maybe 10 pounds...then went and got the WORST haircut I have had in a very long time. That's the LAST time i agree to be a hair model.  So, That didn't help. At all.

August 2012.  Chk and I in Orlando for our nieces wedding. At the rehearsal dinner.

I thought I looked pretty good(The mirror can be deceiving) . I hadn't really gained a lot of weight back, and was kind of holding steady at a size 20 pants and 3x top.  Then I saw the pictures and was truly horrified.

Halloween 2012 at work with my two skinny co workers. Had lost a few pounds again, but still the fat one of the group, always.  Hadn't lost any size in clothing.

March 2013 with my boys. Hadn't gained or lost anything really. Still the same lump.

July 22, 2013.  We were in Capitol Reef National Park in Utah.  At this point I had lost like 12 pounds. I 

had just started my diet a few weeks previous.  I was thrilled with the jump-start and wasn't going to let it go. I was going to keep it going.

Beginning of October 2013. i had lost about 28 pounds at this point. starting to look and feel a lot better. 

Mid October. About 32 pounds gone. Posing with Spock. 

I am starting to not mind my picture being taken. I find I don't have to selectively edit anymore, or be the one in the back so everyone can camouflage my bulk.

The week following this picture, I joined the weight loss clinic and started really taking control.  I went on their recommended diet, I started logging everything on myfitnesspal, and I really started making myself accountable for my weight and weight loss. No more excuses.

Me and my boys on Halloween 2013.  About 40-ish pounds gone.

 People had REALLY started to notice the difference.

FINAL Picture taken December 17th.  

55 pounds GONE FOREVER!!!

Like I said I still have about 20 more pounds to go (I think. We will see. I want to drop 2 more sizes, and I am almost the next size smaller.).

I have dropped lots of sizes, most of my clothing has been donated to Goodwill  and eve my bras, and shoes are too big now!

. 

best part??? My wedding ring fits again. And it fits perfect.  It hasnt fit since 1999, and then it was TIGHT. (Need soap and spit to get it off my finger tight)

I have been seriously motivated. I am so much happier, healthier and feel better about myself.

I have had so many sweet compliments and encouragements. I WANT to keep going. i WANT to be the best I can be, and I am getting there.

So thank you to all who have helped and encouraged me and have stuck by me and made me feel good about myself during this time. I know a huge part of my success is because of the love and support of friends and family and even strangers who drop a note of encouragement in the comments.

THANK YOU for helping me.

I have lost a 5 year old...

BAM! 40 pounds.

42 more to go.

I have lost over 6 points on my BMI !

so happy right now.  i know I STILL have a lot of work to go. It is NOT easy, but I am giving it the old college try. I will never go back. I can only go forward...mostly because I have given away all my clothes that are too big and will have nothing to wear. 

This time it's sticking. For Good. 

Its a struggle...

a few months ago my husband said ;" Get used to the fact you have a beautiful mom, boys".  Finn (10 years old) said "yeah, but all my friends say she's kind of...you know...chubby"  It obviously hurt his feelings when his friend said that, and it embarrassed him. i felt awful for him that MY weight and MY appearance made him feel like that. I know he loves me, but I know he wishes I would take better care of myself.
My 13 year old has kind of hinted at the same thing.


 So a few months back around my birthday I took a good hard look and REALLY made some changes.   It has been amazing. I have had so many positive comments and a fantastic support at work and home and a great cheering section.
In the past 3 months  I have lost 30+ pounds. I feel better, I look WAY better. but I still have a VERY...LONG...WAY...TO...GO!!!!

I have had to buy new pants, and all my tops are getting too big.  Last Sunday I fit into a dress I haven't worn in 11 years. And it was a little loose. I couldn't believe it.

But over the past 2 weeks or so I noticed I was starting to plateau and kind of yo yo, and I was scared about undoing all my hard work. I felt like I was losing motivation, and it was getting harder for my willpower and harder for me to do it on my own. Having a doctor prescribe you something and kind of keep tabs on you is one thing, but going to an actual weight loss clinic where they REALLY keep tabs on you and are with you every step of the way, and are trained in weight loss (rather than just a family Dr.) is completely different.

So yesterday I took the plunge and went to the Weight Loss Clinic down the road.
It is a bi-weekly weigh in, it includes BMI and body fat tracking, vitamins, supplements, weekly injections, food and menu planning/nutritional counseling.
So after talking to my weight loss counselor, I realized I am going about this the wrong way. I did really well to start, but my body is starting to stall and it needs a shake up and re-boot.

 I have decided not to look at actual weight numbers. I want to be a size 12, which is a healthy, realistic goal for me.  So if my blood sugars, blood pressure, and all other things look good and I am a healthy size 12, then so be it...whether its 175 pounds or 200 pounds, I will take it.  I just want to be healthy. I just want to look good.  I don't want my kids to be embarrassed of me. I don't want them to feel like their mom is ugly, or fat and they not want me around.


But like I said I had a bit of a yo yo and some plateauing  and i got scared and needed professional intervention! so glad i did. I feel like this will help me get back on track and keep going the direction I know I need to be going.

So starting this morning I am back on track.

• I have my multi vitamin.
•  I have my phentramine. 
•  I have my weekly injections.
•  I have a food plan.
•  I have an exercise plan.  I have to keep track of everything I eat.  I have to eat a crap ton of protein daily, and avoid certain things like dairy, nuts, peanut butter etc. things i thought were good for you.  (well they are, just not right now)

I decided to do the injection of the  MIC amino Acid shots this month.  Next month I may add B12.

i HATE needles. i HATE shots.  HATE HATE HATE.  But I bit the bullet.  I had her do it in the back of my arm.  The needle itself didn't hurt. Didn't feel that one bit.  What i DID feel was the serum being injected, and that stung like a son of a you know what.  But it is a good injection to have, and it helps keep things running smoothly.


It is out there in the universe.If I blog it, I am accountable.
  I can do this. i HAVE to do this. I owe it to my kids. I owe it to myself.

I will also be sending my dear husband that direction as well.  DH is really very handsome, albeit overweight now.   If he were to get back to where he was 12 years ago when we went on vacation to Hawaii..man, look out world.
I feel like we have been married so long (16 years!) that we have both kind of said "screw it, I don't need to look good for anyone else. My hubby/wife  loves me just the way I am".  I am sad it had come to that. I feel like I WANT to keep looking good for him. I WANT him to be proud of me. And I would hope that he would do the same for me.  i WANT him to look good for me. I want him to have me be proud of him. I want to be that couple who does the fun runs together, and has a fun and active lifestyle. I want to have a fulfilling life with him and with our kids.  I don't want to be the fat mom and dad on the couch who has a hard time doing anything. i want to teach my kids the importance of taking care of yourself and exercise and eating healthy.  i want them to know that they are the most important things in my life and  I will do what it takes to be with them as long as possible.  And I know that by being obese and unhealthy I was depriving them of that opportunity and that was really selfish of me.

So begins a new chapter.  The first 30+ was easy.  This last 30 is going to be the challenge.  But i KNOW I can do it. I am ready.

My diet...for the millionth time.

www.my-calorie-counter.com The webs free Diet Tracker

I have been working hard to lose weight. i finally got serious when I caught glance of myself in a mirror at school and realized just how awful I looked. It doesnt matter how many cute haircuts I get, or the great new color I have, or the nice french tip nails or pedicures, if I look like humpty dumpty I am going to feel bad about myself. If my joey pouch is a dunlap (it's done lapped over my belt) I get mad and then binge eat to hide my depression.

I realize I eat in the following situation:

• anger
• depression
• financial worries
• Peter stress
• school stress
• social setting

So looking at this list it is like 90% of my day.

So I have set a goal and am sticking to it. I am keeping track of what I eat. I am keeping track of exercise.

I have taped up pictures of skinny me to the fridge and cabinets, so when I am tempted to reach for a snack I see them and realize what I am working for.

A huge problem was going out to eat. At school I woulf go out to eat instead of bringing my lunch. It is kind of hard to lose weight eating chinese and chick fil-a and wendys and Bojangles every day.

So I have started bringing my lunch...and only bringing my drivers license with me. No cash, no credit cards. So i cant go out to eat even if I wanted as I have no money with me. I cant even go to the vending machine, which has ZERO healthy options. When I go out to eat with friends I will tell them that I am on a diet and need them to help me find something healthy to eat. I will ask for a box at the start of a meal and immediately put half of it away for leftovers and only eat a healthy portion size.

It has forced me to think about what I should be eating. I have to wake up a little earlier every day to make my lunch. I have to keep the fridge stocked with healthy fruits and vegetables and smart snacks.

I dont have a ton of time to get to the YMCA every day, so once this bronchitis moves out I will be back early mornings. (I jumped on the trampoline yesterday...mistake. I am not quite ready for strenuous lung exercise yet)

So i have a list of activities I can do when I am feeling angry or depressed or sad etc.

I only eat at the kitchen table now, instead of in front of the TV or while at the computer playing games. I am trying to deprogram myself from mindless eating.

I know it is all about moderation and exercise and is a complete lifestyle change. I just need to reach down deep inside and find that motivation. I need to embrace this change completely so I can be the best me ever. so I can look back and think that my 30s were way better than my 20s. That I was happier and healthier and sexier than the old me.

So I am off to look at my gorgeous bathing suit picture from 15 years ago, which has a prominent featured place on the freezer, which is where I keep the ice cream, and find that strength to be the new and improved Sarah.

Of course.

so I get up at 630 this morning to work out. I had it all planned out. I would wake up, come downstairs before my kids and do Pilates.
a few years back I purchased the Windsor Pilates off of some infomercial. I mean, Daisy Fuentes uses it and look how great her body is. However I used it about 5 times and shelved it to be forgotten.
I have been having lower back pain and heel pain and every night I go to bed and my legs are burning. I need a REALLY great stretch to loosen up to help alleviate all of these things.
I was actually looking forward to it. I really was.
I get dressed in my yoga pants and cute T-shirt, head downstairs and pull out my (dusty) Pilates DVD. I Open the case and one of the disks is missing.
I have Disk One, which is a 29 minute DVD on Pilates basics, showing you the moves etc.
I have the accelerated fat burning workout for those who dont have a lot of time. But the actual 20 minute workout DVD is gone. i cannot find it anywhere.
so I think to myself, well I can at least do the basics video, maybe get a few stretches in.
Oh no. Apparently that is not part of the plan. The basics DVD is all scratched and dented and the very center is cracked and broken.
So here I am, awake, trying to do the right thing by exercising and the fates are against me.
I thought I would go out and jump on the trampoline, but it had rained so it is all wet. Plus my kids are up and they would want to jump with me and I would get no peace.

Now that I am up maybe I will just go to the YMCA and work out.
I have about 9 weeks until I go to the Caribbean and am forced to snorkel in a swimsuit. If that is not motivation I dont know what is. But then I have to find my good workout shoes and socks, I have to find my MP3 Player, I have to get my water bottle blah blah blah.
I guess i am just finding excuses. But I really had it in my head to do some pilates.
I will have to run to Target today and pick up a new DVD.

Maybe I will just go back to bed...

Fatty Fatty two by four

So I have my other blog back up and running again. My last post was June 19th. YIKES Im am a slug.
It is my personal workout/weight loss blog.
hopefully it will be inspiring to someone out there!!

if anyone is interested it can be found HERE.
I love encouraging comments to keep me motivated and going!!

woo hoo

so I stepped on the scale this morning for the first time in a week.
since starting my running program 3 weeks ago I have dropped 9 pounds.(this is the start of week 4)

I can mostly see it in my face and butt(the first two places I lose it)
I have had several people at school ask me if i have been losing weight and what I was doing.
My teacher has asked how I have lost so much so quickly. (like I said I lose it in my face first, so it gives the illusion of more)

So Here is my secret: I run for 30 minutes 3 times a week. I have been on the couch to 5k program, MON-WED-FRI. Basically i have been alternating running a certain amount of time with walking and each week i run just a little bit longer and walk a lettle less.
(If I decide to do more I go out and exercise the other 2 days and swim or walk the treadmill.)

I tweaked my diet just a little bit.
Basically i cut out all carbonated beverages, cut back on my sweets intake by 50% and eat slower and eat smaller portions. Oh and I take whole food concentrate vitamins.(horse pills that look and taste like grass, but are chock full of every single vitamin and mineral your body could ever need or want)
Thats it.
Pretty easy.

I feel really good about it and i am doing it the old fashioned way. Exercise, smarter eating habits, and no diet pills.

size 12 here I come!!

2009- my resolutions

UGH. I HATE resolutions.
hate hate hate them.
But every December 31st as the ball drops onto a new year my mind starts working.
"what can I improve on in my life?" "how can I be happier?" "what can I do to cultivate a more spiritual side?" "how can I set a good example to those around me?" "how much weight can I lose if I eat nothing but oatmeal and salad?" You know, the basics.
But every year i look at my list and it is about 476 items long. I know that I will get way to frustrated and give up if I have too many to work on. so I went through and slashed out most of them, and really focused on the BIG 10. These are the 10 things I will work on for the year.


1. Curb my potty mouth. Unfortunately I picked up a very bad habit from my mother and have struggled with it my entire life. I REALLY need to watch what I say, as my kids have started repeating some of my better epithets. I dont think my parents really believe that Charles is the one teaching them those words. Spencer W Kimball, 12th prophet of the LDS church stated "Profanity is the effort of a weak mind to express itself forcibly". Ouch.

2. Couch to 5k. One of my goals this year is to get healthier and more fit. My friend rebecca told me about this exercise program she has started called Couch to 5k. Basically in 9 weeks you train to run a 5k. It iss 3 days a week, for about 30 minutes a day. You start really slow and work your way up to 5k. It is just up my alley. You can find the program HERE. Then my next goal is 10k. Eventually by the end of the year I want to train for a 1/2 marathon. Shanda and Michelle and Alison did that this year and they look just so fantastic and healthy and beautiful. I totally hate them.(in a jealous fat girl way)And Jolin did the full marathon and is my hero. So by the end of the year I will be a fit and healthy active runner. It all starts with that first step. (plus it will help me be in bathing suit shape by our Cruise in September) I will look better, feel better and it will help me with my drooping energy levels and certainly my sleep patterns as well. I will have more energy for school as well.

3.Graduate School on my target date. I have noticed at school there are a lot of advanced students who should have graduated weeks and weeks ago, but are still there because they dont take it seriously enough to have their attendance where it needs to be. They are taking up space in the school that should be reserved for the newer students. My targeted graduation date is September 12th. My goal is to graduate on that date. If I miss a day I will come in on Saturday to make it up. I am not messing around. I am getting it DONE. I dont want to be one of those "space takers" who just come when they feel like it. Their attendance is just enough to not get kicked out.

4. Cultivate a more spiritual side. I need to do a better job of reading scriptures and praying with my kids and teaching them about the bible and about Jesus Christ. I need to do a better job about going to church and to all my meetings, not just when something is expected of me. I need to read the sunday school lesson ahead of time and be prepared to participate in the lessons. I need to magnify ALL of my callings, not just the ones I like. i need to do a better job of being a good member of the church and a good example to those around me.

5. COOK AT HOME! I like to cook. But when I am in school and come home and nothing has been taken out of the freezer, I am more apt to just order a pizza or go to subway instead of finding something to eat. I need to do a better job of meal planning and prioritizing. I need to make sure that Charles knows what needs to be out of the fridge or freezer, in case i forget. I want my kids to grow up with an appreciation for healthy, home cooked meals...instead of cheeseburgers and pizza.(Peter I am not worried about. he is a fruit and veggie nut. But Finn on the other hand has become accustomed to the fatty fast food industry)

6. Simplify my home. I have too much junk. My goal this year is to flylady my way to a clean, organized, clutter free home. I keep my house clean, but I have so much junk and knick knacks and kid clutter and STUFF. My goal is to keep my house "company ready" at all times. On her site, flylady asks "Are you tired of CHAOS?"(Cant have anyone over syndrome). Yes. Yes flylady I am tired of CHAOS.

7. BUDGETING. With the economy the way it is, I resolve to do a better job of budgeting. No more impulse purchases. No more "extras" I dont really need. I am putting myself on a cash budget and once it is gone, it is gone. I will work harder at getting the bills paid on time every month. I will be much more respectful of my money and work harder at being more financially organized.

8. Cutting out junk and pop. Everything in moderation. I know this. This year I resolve to cut out 90% of the junk food and crap I eat. I resolve to drink non-carbonated beverages only and to drink the proper amount of water my body needs. My body will thank me, and I will be happier in the long run. No more sugar slumps. No more caffeine cravings. No more dependence on sugar and pop to give me energy. Occasional sweets are fine, but not all day every day. I am also including vitamins in this. I am REALLY going to work harder to take my vitamins every day.

9. Patience. I REALLY need to work on my patience. Unfortunately i have a quick, fiery temper. I fly off the handle way too quickly. My anger is not a long-smoldering one. It is a flash fire that flares out of control very quickly. It is like gasoline to a flame. My goal this year is to find a way and techniques to keep my anger under control and to find ways to be more patient with others, especially my family.

10. Personal beauty. No I dont mean the things like showering and brushing my teeth. I already do those things. And I am not talking about vanity and always looking in a mirror. I mean always making sure my hair and make-up look their best. Always making sure my legs are shaved and eyebrows are waxed. Making sure I exemplify my chosen profession the best I can. I want to make sure my clothes are pressed and wrinkle free, and that I always look my best. even if it is jeans and a T shirt. Even if I am just running to Walmart or to the Post Office. I want to present a good and positive image no matter what I am doing, no matter where I am going. The better I look, the better I will feel about myself and the easier most of my other goals will be. The better I look, the better i will feel and the harder I will try to make myself a better person all around. The better I look, there better i will feel and the easier for me to help others around me feel the same way.


So those are my BIG 10 goals this 2009. It will nto be a cake walk. In fact I expect to really have to work hard to make sure I am changing my life for the better. No one said it would be easy, but it will be worth it.

HAPPY 2009 and may you keep all your resolutions!

fatty fatty two by four

I decided to add a new blog to my roster.
I have a personal weight loss blog that I will now be doing

http://sarahsfatclub.blogspot.com

the new title of my blog is fatty fatty two by four.
Hopefully i can inspire or motivate others to lose weight.
Maybe I can get a whole club going!

so if you have a moment please check it out.
Like I said it is brand new only one post so far.

Curse of the Elliptical

I got my butt handed to me by an eliptical machine this morning.
Seriously... handed to me...in an unpleasant manner.

As Many of you know i am on a diet and have been working to try and lose weight. thusfar inb 2 weeks I have lost 1 pound.(obviously i havent been serious. I was all talk)
I decided to really get serious about it this morning.
We have a trip to Disney World in October(ish) then in February I am going to Las vegas with a few girlfriends. I really do have a lot to work towards and I am motivated.

So while at the YMCA, looking around at all the gung ho perkies, feeling flabby, fat and lazy(beauty and the beast) I decided to get down to business.
Watching myself try the eliptical machine in the mirror I realized how pathetic I was.
Perky #1 in front of me had nothing jiggling.
Perky #2 next to her had nothing jiggling.
They were chatting while attacking like tigresses.
They were not out of breath, the were barely breaking a sweat. These women were ellipticizing their fannies off and looked as if they were taking a leisurly stroll on the beach.

Yet here I was, barely on the move, huffing, puffing, dripping and dying.

So I did 30 solid minutes. i wanted to DIE. I wanted to fall off, have a heart attack and wake up in heaven where my body will be a perfect size 6. (however I didnt want to leave my children motherless with a father who has no clue how to boil water).
So I fought through the pain. My calves and legs were shaking and rubbery.

But,I worked through it. I did it.

i feel so good.

So although it was only 30 minutes I feel great!

www.my-calorie-counter.com The webs free Calorie Guide

yes 85 pounds. I have gained 85 pounds over the last 11 years, 3 pregnancies and loads of stress.
So once a week I will hopefully update with my weight loss.
PLEASE keep me motivated. Last time I TRULY was motivated and had support I lost 60 pounds.

My husband and I are doing this together. he needs to lose about the same amount of weight.
So this is DAY ONE. You need to start somewhere.

Oh Marshmellow Peeps how I love you.

I know the most important part of Easter should be focusing on Jesus Christ and the resurrection. I know that my heart should be rejoicing and singing hallelujahs to the Saviour. He is risen! and Christ the Lord is ris'n today! etc. But it was hard. REALLY hard.

why was my religious contemplation so difficult for me this year?

Peeps.

I love Easter Candy... I am on a diet...I am going crazy.

All through church all I could think about was my childrens easter baskets filled with starburst, chocolate bunnies, robin eggs and my favorite, Marshmellow peeps.

Peeps are best eaten when the package has been opened and the peeps sit out and develop the hard chewy crust on the outside..

You can roast peeps over a flame and make smores out of them. You can put them in the microwave and blow them up. Peeps are just the best thing about easter. (the yellow chicks. NOT any other color and/or shape. It MUST be the YELLOW CHICKS)

In sunday school my kids got candy from their teachers as a little present. I could smell it all the way home as they were eating it.

All last night at my parents house for Easter dinner all I could think about was diving into that stringy plastic grass and fishing out a stray jellybelly.

But I resisted.

This morning I woke up and the baskets were there staring at me. mocking me.

Today at the drugstore down the road all their easter candy is 75% off. (O sweet mystery of life at last I've found you!)

I am going to have to make Charles hide the keys to the truck.

Oh who am I kidding. Those peeps are going to meet their doom in my stomach.

Eat me! Eeeeat mmmeeeeee!

This morning I had a Come To Jesus Moment.

A true, heart stopping "oh Lord, help me Jesus" moment.

The past two years or so I have kind of fluctuated with my weight. I would lose, then gain, lose then gain. I finally decided to not even pay attention, to go about my daily life and make small healthy changes along the way.

In Theory thats a great idea. In practice it only works if you put effort into it(which I did not). I did not even realize how TERRIBLE it was.

I stepped on the scale. (CRINGE). I have not stepped on a scale in quite awhile. I did notice that my pants were getting tight(and not fresh from the dryer tight).I wont tell you what it read, a lady never divulges her age or her weight. (but I will tell you this. I felt like Nell Carter in the opening credits of Gimme a Break, where she steps on the scale and picks up the scale as if to strangle it.)

I thought, "There must be some mistake!" Yes, a mistake. The Scale is acting wonky, it needs a new battery. I tried weighing myself on hardwood, on tile, on carpet(I was contemplating taking it outside but figured my neighbors didnt need a peep show my my backside. Then, I tried to convince myself it was my 22 pound pair of underwear. Alas, shedding the underwear only helped me lose a tenth of a pound. I took off my wedding band and ring, my camisole, and my socks. woo hoo , down another two tenths!! So, I tried going to the bathroom to help shed some water weight. All in all I managed to lose almost 1/2 a pound in accoutrements and water.

(Obviously) I have decided to go back on a diet. (You better believe in my weight loss journal I am writing my original weight down and counting that 1/2 pound weight loss!!)

THE PLAN:Juicing, plenty of water, going back to the Y for work outs, and eating healthy I can do it. I did it once 6 years ago I can do it again. So I am looking forward to losing the weight and being healthy and buying new clothes.

However, while looking through etsy to find something for Peters school teacher for Teacher Appreciation Week, I found these:

http://www.nuts4candy.etsy.com/. Pretzel windows covered in white and milk chocolate, and nuts.(ahhhhhhhh, the heavens are singing praises unto thee!!) However, I am now on a diet and firmly committed, so get thee behind me Satan!! Get thee behind me with your sweet and salty, crunchy goodness that I am sure would just melt in my mouth and leave me feeling warm and smooshy inside! As I sit here with my bottle of water and a healthy, nutritious breakfast these bad boys are calling my name. Eaaaat meeeeeee. Eeeaaaat meeeeeeeee! Buuuuyyyy meeeeeeee and eeeeaaaaat mmeeeeee! GAH! Lord, give me strength.

This is not the first time I have had a run-in with Nuts4candy. Remember these from my previous blog??

(Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallllleeeeellluuuuujah!)
Handle wrote the Hallelujah chorus about these pretzels, I am sure.
YUM!


But as I said before, i am firmy committed. It is time to lose all my weight for once and for all. No more messing around.
My goal is 60 pounds.
So I will lose 80 so I can buy victory pretzels...

goodbye my sweets, I will see you in a few months! I count down to the days when you will be in my hands and I will sit and eat you in one fell swoop...