anatomy of a cannonball

This memorial weekend we were invited over to a friends pool. Here is a photo series of a cannonball into the pool, courtesy of Finn.

Photos taken on sports mode  with my canon power shot sx50Canon PowerShot SX50 12.1MP 50x Optical Zoom Black Digital Camera (Google Affiliate Ad)

Thats a really great question...

My 7 year old comes up with some of the most intersting questions.
The other day he came up with the mother lode.

While in the Dollar Store, he turns to my husband, and in all seriousness asks
"Hey Dad??  Why dont Geese have boobs??"

Little Finny Foo Foo

August 2003. My baby was born after 23 hours of HARD, NON MEDICATED labor.  Yeah, thats how I roll.
When he was born at 8 1/2 pounds and 20 inches long I looked at him and said "He looks just like Peter".  And he did. Exactly.
we have baby pictures that I wouldnt be able to tell apart without dates on them.
whereas Peter was long and skinny, Finny Foo Foo was my plump, roly poly Michelin Man. He was just such a LOVER!


Finn is my little ray of sunshine. He is always So happy and sweet and loving.  He loves having his back scratched and his tummy tickled.  He finds joy in everything and just makes me so happy.
I LOVE YOU FINN!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!
Here are a few of my favorite pictures of Finny over the past few years. Birthdays, Vacations, Fun Pictures, First Day of School etc.

That seemed to work...

When our kids turn 8 and get baptised, they are allowed to pick one place they would like to go and we go there as a family for a vacation.  When Peter turned 8, he chose Disney World. (At first it was Texas. I asked Whats in Texas?" and he said "I dont know, I just think it would be cool. Maybe we could see Sandy the Squirrel".  Once I told him that Sandy was not real and just a cartoon Character, the idea of Texas was no longer that appealing)

Well, after Peters trip Finn got to work. Yes, he still had 3 years before he really needed to be concerned, but he is always thinking ahead.

He, too, announced that Walt disney World would suit him just fine as his birthday/baptism trip.

I did the research, put in dates and kids ages and found out it would cost $______ amount of dollars. SO we set up our coin and tip jar. All of our change, coins and part of my tips go into this jar to help pay for some of the souveniers etc. I even made up this cool picture on Photoshop of Cinderellas Castle with fireworks etc to paste on the outside . Actually it is a giant animal cracker bin from Sams that I washed out and pounded a coin slot through the lid. It works great. I am betting we can get a couple of hundred dollars in coin stuffed into it.  Right now we have about 22$.

WELL thank you Nickelodeon channel. My kids are no longer allowed to watch you.

They showed a commercial for a Nickelodeon Cruise. Said commercial shows promises of sliming and meeting the characters and fun and Games etc. It sails to the bahamas, St Thomas and Puerto Rico. For 1 week. Finn saw this and got it into his head that the Nick cruise was his trip. He REALLY wanted it.  so being the good mom I am, I looked into it.

For a family of four, the bottom basement, cheapest rooms in steerage START at $6000!! SIX THOUSAND DOLLARS!!!! (Oh yeah and this does NOT include airfare to Florida...or spending money...or tips) 

 And it goes all the way up to 17,000 for a royal suite...which by the way are all sold out. Wow, the economy must be suffering. Those poor people only able pay 17,000 for a family vacation. Whatever will they do?? They cant hold their heads with pride anymore.They will be humiliated at the club. (did you hear that Ken and Buffy could only pay $17,000 for THEIR vacation? Uhhhh, they had to go to the Bahamas...")

I told Finn that a Nick cruise is out of the question. It cost WAY too much money. I dont mind going to DIsney World,( which includes our dining plan, hotel, park passes etc. We can drive to WDW in 7 hours. In fact Disney world is 60% cheaper than a Nick Cruise.) In fact we could go to Disney TWICE for the amount of money we would pay for the Nick cruise.

But Finn unmoved. He persisted. begged. pleaded. bugged. annoyed. irritated.

He REALLY wanted to go on this cruise. It is all  heard. 

So I told him the boat sank.

The Apology

Yesterday we got a call home from Finn's Kindergarten teacher.
"Finn has been very playful today...was not able to focus....fooling around..."
THEN came the kicker: "He really took it over the edge when he decided to test how far he could spit."

I am picturing it now in my head. I can just see him in his classroom, elbowing his buddy J_____, and saying "Hey J____, wanna see how far I can spit??"
then hock-tooey.

I dont know how many times he spit, or if he had a little gang around him watching, or when he decided to do it.

All I know is he was toast when he got home. I made him stay in his room with nothing but his books until dinner. Then we had some family time and he went back up to bed.
There is no TV and no Wii for 3 days. I even made him write the apology letter above.
I dont know if you can see the little tear stains on the paper or not. He was so mad at me.
"It's too hard" "I am just a little kid, I cant write such a long letter"(Well if it wasnt to hard to hock a loogie halfway across the classroom, then it isnt too hard to write a three sentence apology to your teacher.)

Then when he saw I was unmoved by his plea, he launched into the classics:
Im not your friend anymore" , "You are a mean mom. Im going to live at Amy's house!" and my personal favorite "I just dont want you anymore"
He ran the whole gamut of emotions:pleading, crying, yelling, screaming, apologizing, sweetness and light, back to screaming. It was a really fun day. No really, I enjoy my normally mild mannered sweet boy acting like a total jerkface. Makes me feel really good. I really feel like a good mom when he screams "I dont like you anymore" or "I dont want you anymore"(actually I think it is kind of funny. I keep my cool and he gets more and more frustrated trying to come up with insults and things he thinks will get him his way)

So Ms V, I apologize as well for my sons behaviour and his little salivary escapade.

Finn explains The Oobleck

ok so in school(kindergarten) Finns class read about Oobleck. (dr Seuss gooey sticky rain or some such stuff)
His teacher brought in homemade Oobleck(cornstarch and water to make the gooey solid/liquid.)
The kids could use their 5 senses with it and then write down their observations on a piece of paper. It was all very sciency.

so I am re-creating what finn wrote in his boxes:

Sight: Mese
Touch: Stece
sound: Nuffing
Smell: bad ewwwwwww
taste(teacher typed WE DO NOT TASTE IT.)

so as a quick translation, for those of you who dont know how to read Kindergartener:
It looked MESSY
It felt STICKY
It sounded like NOTHING
It Smelled BAD(ewwwwwwww)

that kid. Nuffing. Thats what I am going to say from now on.
Hey, whats going on? eh, nuffing.

pictures from the week

Just a few pictures from my week.

I caught finn putting stickers on his face:

Here is the Gang from our Willie Wonka Movie Theme at School:

Here is my final exam up-do. It was a "make your own" using at least 2 techniques we learned in Long Hair design. i did pretty well and the teacher said it was creative. i used a french roll(vertical twist) with loops and hand formed curls. I did a braid on one side as well and some two strand cross overs.

Thats about all. Hopefully I will have more to post next week.

Finn Playing Soccer

Here are some pictures of Finn playing soccer in a little church league that Michelle had formed.
There were several moms who wanted to enroll their kids in soccer, but didnt want to pay $100 to have a mass of kids in one huddle all trying to kick at the ball. So we formed our own little league and they play and have fun every Saturday.

He actually is pretty good. But everyone is 4 and 5 years old, and so there isnt a whole lot of technique or rules. The Red Team(team Jolley), has the strategy of " We All Hold Hands Like Red Rover and They Can't Break Our Defenses"

The Blue Team has their secret weapon, Hannah. As she is running and kicking the Ball , if she sees people coming to try and get it from her, she lays down ON the ball...being careful not to touch it with her hands of course.

Last Saturday Finn scored 2 goals!

Here is his team rarin and ready to go:

After the game the all celebrated with Otter Pops.

So Thanks Michelle for doing this! Finn has loved it!

Finn is Barak's #1 fan

Finn cracks me up.

At school they did "Kids Vote" and up on the bulletein board they had the election process, the candidates and where they were from, and which party they were for. Thats all. No discussing issues, or what republican meant, or what democrat meant. After all these are 5-10 year old kids, and discussions and lessons of that magnitude would cause their little brains to implode.

Well Finn comes home a few weeks back and was talking about it.

Our conversation.

FINN: We voted today. Guess who I voted for!!

ME: Well you dont have to tell me, votes are supposed to be private. It isnt anybody's business who you decide to vote for. But you can tell me if you want.

FINN: Well I voted for Barak Obama

Me: Why?

FINN: Because he has a cool name and I like his picture.

ME: Gosh that seems like a good reason to elect someone as President.

So I explained when he got older that he would be able to vote for real and he would need to listen to what each person believed in and how they would help the country. That we shouldnt vote for someone based on looks or their cool sounding name. She he asked who I was voting for and I said that I was going to write in Mr. Witt, his school principal. (He LOVES Mr Witt and he thought that sounded like a pretty good idea, but that his picture was not up on the board, and how were we going to solve this dilemma?)

Then last night he was in on the potty doing his business with the door to the toilet room shut. I was in the main part of the bathroom at the sink, trying to undo the make-up "dramatic eye" that Laine had given me at school during our facial make-up theory.

I hear him just singing and making up songs, no idea I was in there and listening.

(Just sung to random tunes and rapping a little bit)

"I like to color. Didnt you know? I like to color, especially with green."

"Get up off your easy chair, V-O-T-E, vote. Oh yeah, Barak Obama, Barak Obama won. Didnt you know I voted for Barak. Barak uh huh, Barak Uh-huh, Barak Obama."

So we go out to dinner with my parents and he is sitting next to my mom. He said hey gram! Barak Obama won! (She voted for McCain), so teasingly she put her hand over his mouth and said "Oh No! John McCain Won!"

Finn cracked up laughing, and as soon as she took her hand off his mouth he yells out BARAK OBAMA! So it kind of turned into a game and he just kept saying Barak Barak Barak Barak.

He just likes saying the name...over and over and over again.

My son...Barak's biggest fan.

That's not acting...thats sheer terror

I feel as if I should be taken out back and flogged for my incompetence.

I know Disney like the back of my hand. I knwo which rides are scary, which rides are not. I know every twist, turn, drop etc. I know how fast each one goes, how slow each one goes. The vacation Nazi felt prepared to take her kids to Disney World.

However, I had spent the better part of 6 months largely ignoring Universal Studios and the rides and descriptions.

It was Our first day at Universal Islands of Adventure. We had been on Spider Man and Cat in the Hat and ET and Poseidons fury. As we were walking through Jurassic Park, we saw a log ride. It didnt say anything about "You WILL get soaked" or "You must be 54" tall to ride this" etc. It didnt show any signs of being a scary water ride. We thought we would be taking a log ride through "Jurassic Park". DInosaurs and a Log Ride, a perfect way to end the day.

After all the height requirement was only 42", and the only sign was "twists and turns and sudden drops". Well all the rides said that, and not having done any research I ASSUMED we would be fine. Plus there was a little blurb that read this: "Take an unforgettable river raft ride, and see dinosaurs in their natural habitats. "

We got on the ride and meandered through Jurassic Park. Then uh oh, the dino's escaped and we went through the restricted part of the park. Oh No the dinosaur is getting out of the crat! Watch out for those velociraptors, they are fighting over a maintenance man's shirt! Silly stuff the kids loved. It was calm and fine and slow and a little jerky, so I figured it was more or less the "Its a Small World" of Islands of Adventure. We go up a hill "into the lab" and at the top a giant T rex lights up, roars and scares the pooh out of everyone in the log. Next thing I know we are dropping, hurtling down at lightning speed. This drop was 85 foot plunge! We had no idea it was coming and it was scary. I had the presence of mind to put my hand on Peter to keep him back, but Charles was sitting next to Finn and did nothing.

At the end my boys were crying, Finn was at his breaking point he wanted nothing to do with Universal studios after that. It was horrible.

The picture however was HILARIOUS. Of course I had to buy it. Every time I look at it I laugh out loud...then feel shame for my lack of research.

There is no acting, that is SHEER TERROR. I scanned it and cropped it to just the kids faces.

But Finn's face, is PRICELESS!

It's almost something you see in the cartoons.

I need a vacation from my vacation 2

well we are back!
A LONG yet very fun week.
We went to Universal Studios, Universal Islands of Adventure, Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Hollywood studios(formerly MGM) and Animal Kingdom.
We have lots of memories, a few funny stories and tons of pictures, which I will post all throughout this week.

Turns out my "No Fear" 5 year old who is my adventure junkie thrill seeker is not much into fast rides, coasters or things that go down hills. He did fine until Universal Islands of Adventure and we went on Jurassic Park. It just got worse from there. All week he fretted and fussed about how fast or slow a ride was, how big or little the hill was, would it go up fast or up slow. He cried before he even got onto rides. It was actually a little surprising. Finn is always the one who is jumping out of the tree house, finding new and inventive ways for an adrenaline rush. He has always been my "lets go lets go lets go" boy.

Peter, who has always been a little more timid and reserved and seems to be scared of everything REALLY surprised me. He doesnt have much use of his left hand and arm. He is always more shy and scared to do things, for the longest time he didnt even want to go down tall slides at the playground. But he promised me that at WDW he would try all the rides at least once. Turns out Mr shy and timid is a roller coaster enthusiast! He rode Space Mountain TWICE, and Expedition Everst FOUR TIMES!! He just loved it. I think I could have gotten him back onto tower of terror again if we had more time. He really loved the thrilling rides and the rollercoasters and the fast rides.

A few highlights From Each park:

(Epcot)They LOVED Mission Space. We didnt do the wimpy green one either. We did the full out orange team with the spinning and the G-force pulling your face back to your ears as you blasted off to Mars. The one where as you are blasting off you can feel your stomach sinking lower and lower and it just keeps sinking. I actually cry out every time I ride it. I dont think my stomach can sink any lower and it does. It is just such an amazingly realistic ride.

(Animal Kingdom)- Peter loved Everest.(four times it was awesome). Finn Loved the Kali River Rapids. I happened to be sitting in the wet seat BOTH TIMES. I was soaked. A Bugs Life was a big hit as well.

(Hollywood Studios) I Loved Tower of Terror. It is my favorite ride. The one we went on had a GREAT sequence of drops and ascents. It was fantastic. The boys LOVED Star Tours. As soon as the movie was over, Finn in a loud voice said "That was TOTALLY AWESOME!"

(Magic Kingdom) Peter Loved Space Mountain. Finn did not. Finn and Peter both loved one of my favorite rides "Peter Pans Flight". Splash Mountain was fine until the last drop at the end and Pirates of the Caribbean was a big hit for all. Mickeys Philharmonic was so much fun too.

Universal studios and Islands of adventure was really fun all around. If anyone is going to IOA anytime soon you MUST ride the spiderman ride. It was amazing. The boys loved the Cat in the Hat ride, E.T and the Woody Woodpecker kiddie coaster.

So thats kind of a brief synopsis. I will post pictures this week etc.

Our tooth fairy comes on the 1st and the 15th of the month...

Finn has been OBSESSED with losing his teeth. He thought it was so cool that when Peters teeth fell out he got shiny gold dollars under his pillow (hey the tooth fairy has to use those things up from the post office somehow!)

So for the past few weeks he has insisted his tooth was loose.

I felt it and perhaps it was the teenyist bit loose. Well he hooked onto that tooth with a mission. Every time I looked his direction his finger was in his mouth and he was just a wigglin' away on it.

That tooth got looser and looser. One day it got so loose it was about 1/4 of an inch taller than his other teeth. When he would breathe, the tooth would pfff forward with exhales and ffftt back with the inhales. He wouldnt let me yank it though. All it would have taken was a quick tug and it would have come right out. He insisted it fall out without any medical or parental intervention.

So,I gave him a donut for a snack and as he was eating I hear "Hey, I lost my tooth!"

I go over and sure enough his tooth fell out. He spit it out and said "I cant believe it! I lost my tooth. I was eating my donut and next thing I know I was chewing my tooth! Can you believe it? I lost my Tooth! Hey Peter, I finally lost a tooth!"

He was so proud.

The next morning on his breakfast plate was a crisp, beautiful Disney Dollar (a dollar from disney world that can be used as money there)

FINN: DAD! I got a Disney Dollar. The Toof Fairy left me a Disney Dollar! Isn't that awesome?

DAD: Wow, a whole disney Dollar? Thats pretty Cool buddy!

FINN: I know. Look Peter, the Toof Fairy left me a disney Dollar!

PETER: Yeah, thats great finn.

DAD: Hmmmm, I wonder how the tooth fairy knew we were going to Disney World?

FINN: Hmm, maybe she heard us from her castle or something.

So yay, he finally lost a tooth. Now if only I can keep him from yanking out all his other teeth. That dollar thing was a pretty good deal!!

I DEFINITELY spawned a hairwrecker

Finn decided to cut his hair again.
We have been reading "Junie B Jones is a Beauty Shop Guy". I dont know if that is where he got the idea, or if he really liked the feeling of a shaved head after his first foray into the world of cosmetology.

The other day he was outside playing with the hose. He CLAIMS he was rinsing off his scooter.
(And I am Marilyn Monroe).
So he came inside a while later and I noticed a spot on the top of his head that his hair looked kind of funny. It kind of looked like there were a few spots that had been wet, so maybe those spots were matted down or something. An hour later I noticed it again.

ME: Finn, Come over here.

FINN: What? What is it mom?

ME: Just come here, I need to see something

FINN: Peter did it.

ME: What did Peter do?

FINN: (quietly) Cut my hair.

PETER: LIAR! I didnt do it. You faker!

FINN: Yes you did Peter.

PETER: NO! No i didn't. You're Lying.

ME: Peter did you cut his hair?

PETER: No.

ME: Finn, did Peter cut your hair?

FINN: (silence)

ME: Peter did you HELP finn cut his hair?

PETER: no.

ME: Peter did you know finn was cutting his hair?

PETER: Yes. I watched him do it.

ME: Why didnt you tell him to stop.

PETER: Well he never listens to me anyway.

ME: Finn, did you ask Peter to cut your hair?

FINN: Uh-huh.

ME: Did he help you?

FINN: He watched.

ME: DO i need to put you on my blog again so people can make fun of you?

So now Finn has two strips of his head that are about 1 to 1 1/2 inches long that have no hair.
This time I am NOT messing with it. If he is going to be a Beauty Shop Guy, then he is going to have to live with the consequences.
I REALLY thought that after the first incident of hair cuttery that it would be the end of it.

But like I said 3 months ago, once a hairwrecker, always a hairwrecker.

Do they let hairwreckers into Cosmetology school??

PS: I have decided to go full time. That way I dont have to give up anything, and will be done in a year.

5 years of Finn

Here are just a zillion of my favorite pictures throughout Finn's first 5 years of life. As you can see he is just such a smiley, happy boy.(most of the time)

This is Finn as a newborn. He looked JUST like Peter. If dates were not written or printed on the pictures, I wouldnt know who I was looking at.

Finn at about 3 1/2 months old. He was just such a chunk-a-roni!! He could eat.

About 6 months. He was into EVERYTHING! This was about the time he morphed into Hurricane Finn.

Finn about 19 months. This was taken at The Ronald McDonald House when Peter was in the hospital.

Finn and Peter, Christmas 2005. Peter just a few months post transplant and still on fairly high doses of Prednisone. (you can really see it in his face)

Finn at age 3 playing in his clubhouse with some friends.

Eating one of his favorite foods...cereal. If I am not mistaken those are Golden Grahams...some of my personal favorites as well.

Enjoying the Slip N Slide for his 4th Birthday!

Being Silly on the Trampoline when his Uncle Daniel and Aunt Laura came to visit.

Finn at Easter 2008, making a cupcake. The joy of sugar...

Finn not wanting to join the picnic fun. See what a grouch he can be when he turns it on?

OOPS! I have a burgeoning "hairwrecker" on my hands.

Ahhh, blue mouth cotton candy. I love this picture. It really shows his sweet and " I love life" personality.

"Im Batman".

I Love you Finny Foo Foo. Congrats on turning 5. Hope it treats you well! Keep being the sweet and loving boy you are. You are my sensitive peacemaker. I WUBBA YOU!

Finn's birth story

Today is my baby boys 5th birthday. I can hardly believe it.

I was induced at 40 weeks (let me rephrase. i FORCED them to induce at 40 weeks). a few days previous I had gone in for my weekly appointment.

"any contractions?" (No)

"Any Cramping?" (No)

The exam revealed that I was at a 0 with 0% effaced. I was tight as lid on a new jar of pickles. I was due August 3rd. It was August 6th.

I grabbed the doctor by the shirt collar and tie, pulled him towards me and said "GET...THIS...THING...OUT..OF...ME!" He backed up against the wall "Nurse! Nurse! Security!"

Ok i made that up. But I did say "I cannot take it any longer, you have GOT to get this little fool out of me. He runs around in there 24/7/ He never sleeps, I have sciatic nerve pain, I am tired, I am huge. I cant do this any more. This is my 3rd child and I am at my wits end. When can you induce?" He looked at me and weighed his options. If he said no, he had 4 steps to make it to the door...did he dare risk it? He was kind of an older fellow, and a pregnant lady on a rampage is no joke. Common sense prevailed.

"How about tomorrow?"

So we went in on August 7th, and they started me on a special concoction to get my labor kickstarted. And boy did they.

It was miserable all night, and then the next morning they cranked up the Pitocin. The contractions were off the charts and I had no medication to help me through it. I wanted to get through it as naturally as I could. They called in the Anesthesiologist to give me an epidural at 5pm and finally (and mercifully) broke my water at a 3-4 cm. I had labored hard and long and was only at a 4.

I told the doctor" Dont go far, he will be here in 15 minutes". The Dr, thinking he knew more about birthing babies than I knew about ME birthing MY OWN babies kind of scoffed.

"You are only at a 4. You have a few hours" and he sailed out of the room.

"Dont say I didnt warn you!" I yelled after his backside and bald spot.

20 minutes later I was pushing, my epidural barely having time to work. Finn was a "sunny side up" baby, meaning he was born face up instead of face down. I had to push HARD to get him out. But thankfully, as a dr once told me "You are built for having babies".(read: cow) So I was lucky and only had about 5 pushes worth...but I had to push extra hard.

The British Nazi nurse tried to give me an episiotomy, but I held her back with a crucifix, garlic and holy water. "well", she said in her snooty Liverpool accent, "If you would would rather tear, be my guest". Yes I would rather tear than you cutting my va jay jay open with scissors you sadist!

The Dr sailed in just in time to catch him as he fell onto the table.

"I TOLD you not to go very far" as I said smugly.

"Yes, now shut up" as he sticthed up the little tear.

"I TOLD you I didnt need an episiotomy" I gloated at the British Nurse Nazi.

"Yes, now shut up" she said as she started poking and prodding and yanking out my epidural.

"So tell me, was it really worth it to have an epidural for only 30 minutes?", she asked condiscendingly.

"YES!" I practically screamed at her. "It gave me a chance to rest. I had been doing hard natural induced labor for 23 hours with no sleep. Gave me time to not have to think and I was able to relax a little before having to do the hard work".

She stomped out of the room in a huff, obviously condeming me to hell for requesting medication, her passive agressive contempt not garnering the results she had hoped.

But Charles Finn McBride was a beautiful baby. My first words as they put him on my chest was "He looks just like Peter!".(he was a tad smaller than peter by an inch and 1/2 a pound)

8lbs, 20" long.

The Liverpool Vampire sailed back in and immediately tried to get him to nurse. Finn did not take kindly to it.

She said I was doing it wrong. Finn still did not take kindly to it. They brought in a lactation specialist. Finn STILL did not take kindly to it. At one point it was hurting so bad and the vampire chippy said to me "Oh come on, it cant hurt that bad".

Lady if I didnt have a diaper on I would totally jump across the room and b-slap you right now.

We had a parade of visitors(we had a family reunion going on at the same time. I opted to have a baby, rather than attend.). Cousins, aunt and uncles. Thay all declared Finn "just precious".

We went home 24 hours later(insurance kicks us out you know) and here we are 5 years later!!

Finn you are my sunshine. You alwaya make me happy. You have such a joy and zest for life. you wear your emotions so close to the surface. You express joy and laughter and just make me so glad that I am your mom . You are so smart and funny and my special guy. I am so proud of you! You are starting Kindergarten this year and it makes me happy, yet at the same time a little said. I wont have you around to keep me company during the day and wont have you around to make me laugh.

I LOVE YOU FINN FINN!!

Haiwreckers part deux

In my own quest to destroy my follicles, I have spawned a mini-me. His name is Finn, and he is a burgeoning Hairwrecker. (see also here)

I thought we were past the age of this nonsense. Apparently I was wrong.

I SHOULD have just let him walk around like that, teach him a lesson. But I didnt. I pulled out the Wahl Clippers, took off the attachments and buzzed the heck out of him. Voila!

This buzz should las all summer. Unfortunately, it will probably NOT be the last time I have to do this. We hairwreckers are notorious for not being able to leave our hair alone...ever.

Oh Poop

I had a previous post about why I will never win a mother of the year award (something about a photoshoppd picture and telling my 4 year old we already went to disney world)
Now let me tell you why i SHOULD win one.

Poop.

One tiny word. One human by-product than can either make you or break you.

Saturday night 3am: "help. dad. help.dad. help. dad.daaaaad. heeeelllllppp!"
Charles gets out of bed and goes into the bathroom to find Finn COVERED in poop. And not a nice logger poop, but kind of that mushy soft sticky poop that gets everywhere. You could have patched a roof with it.
"Oh Crap" (literally) says hubby as he lifts finn into the shower. still mostly clothed.

I struggle to get my rear in gear and head into the bathroom and this is what I find.

1. Finn in a nightshirt and socks only, with poop all on his rear and legs, smeared on his socks and all over his nightshirt. I find toilet paper sticking to the poop and it is all over his hands and fingers. He is standing in the bathtub wondering what to do next, crying. He is almost 5 years old and has never had a poop accident. He has been potty trained for 2 1/2 years and never had a problem. He was just so embarassed. Apparently he was asleep and dreaming and pooped in his sleep. But he woke up, made it to the bathroom and tried to clean it up himself as best he could. i am really thankful that he had the presence of mind to call us in before things got much worse.

2. I find his soiled underwear on the tile floor, poop down(is poopy underwear like buttered bread?) I pick up the underwear and leave a glob of poo on the floor. It is in the grout, on the rug, smeared on the toilet seat and wall, just everything is covered in poop.

3.Charles, green around the gills, holding it in before he gags. On a related side note, charles and I have an unspoken agreement. He gets barf, I get poop. He handles barf WAY better than poop, whereas I handle poop so much better than barf. It is a nice arrangement. Except at 315 am when i am tired and grouchy.

So Charles goes off to make sure there is no poop footprints or anyhting on the bed sheets etc. He brings me up the all purpose cleaner and disinfectant. I clean up the surroundings as best I can, wipe it down and spray my tea tree oil mixture to kill the germs.
I undress finn, getting more poop on him in process. I threw away his underwear as I refuse to wash any kind of stuff like that. I would rather buy a new pack of underwear than deal with cleaning his old ones out.

Charles takes out the trash to the outside bin as I give Finn a shower and get all the poop cleaned off. I got it out from under his fingernails and bellybutton. I got it off his legs, thighs, feet, ankles, tushie etc. Thank goodness for a hand held showerhead! I put him at the back of the tub, bent him over and let the showerhead and its various settings do all the work. Surprisingly it was a lot harder than I thought. That stuff was stubborn and sticky! But I finally got it off, pulled him out and dried him off, and sent him back to bed. It was 335.
I did a quick rinse of the tub and sprayed it down with cleaner and disinfectant. I got back to bed at 345.
I was awake pretty much the rest of the morning.
So in honor of Poop, here is one of the funniest moments in Scrubs history: Everything Comes Down to Poo


So I may torture my kids with fake vacations, but I also get up in the middle of the night and clean up poop.

1 point going to hell
3 points good mom!

Things that make me happy this week

I find that in general I am a fairly cynical person. My glass tends to be half empty, my clouds never have a silver lining and I feel I am always saying "why me". So Instead of focusing on the negatives, here are 11 positives that make me happy.


1. Trader Joe's Cinnamon Schoolbook Cookies. "They're elementary, My dear Joe."
Each 1lb tub comtains cinnamon cookies in the shapes of the alphabet and 0-9. These little bite size wonders are fairly low calorie and taste like a crunchier version of snickerdoodles. You get 15 for 3 weight watchers points. A great little snack that satiates my sweet tooth yet keeps my points in reason.



2. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. TCM was playing this the other night so I sat and watched it for the 300th time. Let me tell you why I love this movie. The acting is terrible, the musical segues are hilarious and Above all else, Benjamin. I also like saying the name Dorcas. Why Dorcas Gailen! The backdrops are so obviously fake and when the actors move or sing or dance it is glaringly obvious. There is no musical segue at all. They will be talking and next thing you know they are singing. (oh adam, Im just so happy la la la la la) I love those 7 big, brawny brawling men (why those pontipee men are all as tall as church steeples). I love when Howard Keel(Adam) is singing Bless your beautiful hide and he says "howdy ma'am" and she says "Well howdy backwoodsman". But the most important reason I Love 7BF7B is Benjamin Pontipee, played by Jeff Richards. He was so drop dead gorgeous. He wasnt a singer or dancer. They hired him because he was tall and they needed a tall man to play opposite Julie Newmar(Dorcas). You see him sing, you see him "kind" of dance, but when it gets down to the nitty gritty he usually stands in the background looking pretty doing conga thumbs.He was the brawler. He was always the one to step in and deck someone and take out 4 of his friends in the process. sigh. i love the women standing around in the middle of winter wearing their underthings and petticoats, dancing around singing "oh they say when you marry in June...". I love Millie wearing a patchwork quilt as a skirt, expecting a baby sitting in a rocking chair as if she is some sort of invalid. I love Howard Keels big booming laugh. This is just a great movie. My neice, Denice, and I used to sit and watch it and just do an entire Mystery Science Theater 3000 on it. good times. Can't want to see you in July Denice!!

3. Big Lots. I got Coppertone spray on sunscreen for $5! Usually it is 9 or 10 at the other stores. I also got a giant bx of corn pops, a giant box of cheerios for 2$ each. Cant beat Big Lots.

4. Finn. I was listening to the Top Gun soundtrack and Berlin's "Take my breath Away" came on. I was singing and Finn said "Hey mom? Why does she want her breath taken away? Wouldn't she die?" Also he is the king of asking the same question over and over, just in different ways. Did you have video games when you were little? No. only when you were big? when you were little did you have old video games? just new ones when you were big? you didnt like video games when you were little? Just when you were big. Why didnt you like video games when you were little and only when you were big? Did you not have a video game machine when you were little with old games? My mothers curse has come to fruition, he IS just like me. But he is as sweet as can be and funnier than poop on your shoe. He is always coming up with the funniest things to ask or say. And he is so loving and sweet. Sometimes he will just come up and hug me and say "I love you mom" and not be trying to butter me up for something he saw on Television. He is also the peacemaker with Peter. He will do whatever Peter wants just so Peter will play with him. He just loves and worships his big brother and is always saying "hey Peter look at this! Hey Peter! Hey Peter!"

5. The Red Leather Diary by lily Koppel. I am not happy because it was a great book, , I am happy that I am DONE reading it. Dont get me wrong, I enjoyed it. It just wasnt my cup of tea. i enjoyed the pictures and the background and I appreciated that she was so open. In fact there were parts that I could completely relate to her. BUT she was one of those wild cards that I just didnt understand her way of thinking or reasoning. Maybe I need to pull my prissie panties out of my tush and have a more open mind. I will wait to see what the other ladies thought of it at Book Club next week.

6. School is almost out and the pool opens full time soon!! Yay for the Y!! I apologize in advance to all the patrons of the Y who will soon see the great white whale. i am in the turqoise floral swimsuit. You will recognize me. I am reflective white and look like I escaped from Sea World. Hopefully by the end of the summer I will look more like a Walrus than Ahab's Obsession!

7. My garden is thriving. I already have tomatoes starting and peppers starting. I had the first blossoms on my squash and my beans are starting to send out their feelers. It is all looking so well and I am very hopeful. I have been very attentive and have been composting like crazy. In fact we put out our pulp from our juicer daily. Every day we walk past the compost bin you see a huge black fruit fly cloud. Dont walk to close or you will suck them in and swallow one(personal experience) Fruit flies do NOT taste like chicken.

8. Good Hair day. I dont know what it is. I got lucky I guess. At least I have one thing going for me.

9. Pedicure. I got a pedicure for Mothers Day last week. My feet have never looked or felt so good. It has been 2 years since my last pedicure. I am sure the woman doing my feet was thrilled to have to saw through an inch of dead calloused skin. But they are so smooth and pretty now. i need to get one of those foot baths and do them at home to keep my feet looking pretty.

10. The Home Economist. Health food and organic store in the area. They have just about every spice and herb in bulk, every rice and grain known to man. every salt, sugar and flour available on the market. We buy our wheat berries there to grow our own wheatgrass. 1.29 a pound, which will last us almost a month. You cant beat it. Well they now have the Nut Butter machine. In one side is fresh peanuts. In the other side is fresh almonds. You pick which butter you want, pick your container and push the button. The machine smooshes the nuts and out pops fresh peanut butter or fresh almond butter. No sugar or salt added, no chemicals or preservatives. It is so good I cant even describe it.

11. I have lost 4 pounds. YAY. Weight Watchers really works if you follow it carefully, measure out food and exercise. Did you know that 5 minutes on the Trampoline is like a brisk 15 minute walk?? So I think I can magane to squeeze in 10 minutes of tramp time a day and hit the Y for water aerobics or spinning or Zumba.(I will be the fat uncoordinated one in back trying to shake my groove thang)

So those were just a few things that have made me happy this past week.

Every day I will find at least 2 good things about the day or something that has made me happy.

what makes you happy?